Dear Sir,

I have been challenged to a duel by a green-eyed (it's a sign of the devil) and red-haired (Irish tempers, you know what they're like) woman of the witchly persuasion and as I am a great fan of your patriotic passion, I am writing to you to ask that you be my second for the duel. I know I can trust you, as one American to another, to ( Read more... )

( Colbert had not been pleased with the lack of patriotism he had seen here so far. )

Strong Bad did not know that lazy Sunday was for watching the Chronic(what?)cles of Narnia. He was hanging around campus wishing The Cheat would show up so they could plot some capers. Since The Cheat was not forthcoming, after a while he moseyed over to the Great Hall in search of melonade ( Read more... )

( Owl to Miss Sto Helit )

( Understanding the ununderstandable. )

( Ancient Runes class sign-up sheet, written in magically-flashing red-blue text on a white background )

( Curriculum Vitae of Mr. Stephen Colbert )

The Sorting Hat and Stephen Colbert, having determined there is a plot against the school by Canadian Weasley bears have run from the Sorting Room, weapons in hand, to seek out and defeat their foes, who they believe to be currently residing in Slytherin.Along the way, the Hat realized that in its haste to do battle, it forgot to actually Sort ( Read more... )

( Cut for excessive amounts of truthiness )